Advice from a seasoned mom and birthday party entertainer about hosting a Music & Movement kids party inside your home

After years of hosting my own kids birthday parties at our house, plus bringing kids music to many, many homes as a birthday party entertainer for the last 3 years, I think I have learned a thing or two to pass on.

I actually got my start as a children's musician by dabbling at some of my own kids parties, and then helping out friends with theirs. This is before I became a Music Together teacher and learned how to do it "for real"!

Here are a few early snapshots of those days. Keep in mind this is before instagram and amazing camera phones. ...these definitely show there spontaneous, unfiltered "age".

First time singing for kids at my son's train themed birthday party in 2008!

Unicorns! Lot of little girls around our kitchen table

Circa around 2016? My daughter's small birthday gathering while the downstairs bathroom/hallway reno was not yet completed

My nuggets of wisdom as someone who is part of SO MANY young kid birthday parties in a variety of homes, with a range of kids personalities, party sizes, and adults in attendance are as follows:

1. Less is frequently more. More does not necessarily mean happier kids or

grownups.

1 entertainer is enough for a typical 2-2.5 hour party. Let kids arrive and acclimate by having out a simple craft activity or 1-2 simple toy stations (building toy, pretend play figures, and/or active play with balance rocks, beach

balls etc). Children (especially 3 and unders) are more likely to become overwhelmed and overstimulated when presented with too many choices.

From my experience, parties that have multiple vendors at the same time (face

painter, balloon animals, bouncy house, catered food buffet, and more than 1 active kids entertainer like a musician, magician etc.) tend to have a more stressful feel overall. It is also harder to build that wonderful sense of community and shared experience when everything feels scattered and overwhelming. All great options that I listed above, but you really only need to pick one (or maybe 2 if larger party or longer duration of time).

I have found both as a parent and a musician that the parties that everyone

shows up for and talks about after are the at-home parties that are warm and

focused on shared joy.

2. Make the home and gathering space (especially for music & movement activities)

much cooler than you think!

In colder months, turn the heat on low, consider cracking windows, and do this BEFORE guests arrive. In the warmer months, this is not the time to be conserving energy. Make the AC blow, and make it degrees cooler than typical. You WILL thank me later. Wherever people gather together, especially with the addition of dancing and other movement it gets hot fast.

3. Sometimes Birthday kids get overwhelmed, and/or may display a change in personality.

Your outgoing child becomes clingy. Your quiet child is moving non stop.

Best thing you can do is meet them where they are. Show them how to

participate by doing it yourself without coaxing them.

It doesn't happen with every kid, but it does happen.

They were too excited to sleep last night, grandparents or other family is in town and someone gave them candy for breakfast, guests have arrived and now fill their "safe" place, they don't like all the attention, they are sooo excited they wore themselves out, they become observers (instead of the active participant you were expecting) because they are trying to remember and cherish this special day.

Don't worry, they will talk about it nonstop in the days and weeks to come.

4. Think about the needs of your guests and plan in advance.

Put hand sanitizer pumper bottles in visible locations, along with tissues and

wet wipes. Use signs on doors if you don't want them opened and consider posting a few signs with arrows to the bathroom (this is a fantastic job for older

sibling. Hand drawn signs by kids are the best!). Will there be nursing moms looking for a quieter space? Where will diapers be changed? Let them know if food will be served and what time. Did you let them know in advance to dress comfy for sitting on the floor and moving around for the activity portion? I could tell you stories of showing up for a 1 year old birthday party....

where the grownups are dressed to the nines (beautiful, but the ankle length dress and heels are going to make bouncing that baby and jumping up and down a whole lot trickier. Those 1 year olds can' do it on their own!)

5. Don't start serving food when your entertainer is about to start. Have a dedicated time before or after entertainment.

Sorry, not sorry. Kids eating food while singing, moving, jumping, twirling, using

props etc. is not safe (risk of choking) or a good idea on many levels. Entertainers also need to product their props and equipment from spilled juice and all the rest of it..... you get the idea.

Grown ups should be available to participate with the younger kids, have fun,

dance, sing, and help with certain community building props like a parachute.

Hard to do with a big plate of that delicious spread on their lap.

6. You need MORE open gathering space than you think you do. Now read that

again.

Almost everyone has to move furniture. Not every home can accommodate the the amount of guests you invited. The kids will need room to stomp, twirl, jump,

be in a circle, ... and depending on the party, it's not unusual for the grownups to outnumber the kids. It can be helpful to think of a couple of square feet for each participating child. Bigger kids = need more space. I now use a Facetime or video call for every in-home party I book. It is so very helpful to have a space plan worked out in advance for both me and the host.

Furniture moving tip: Do it the night before. You will find at least 3 missing

socks, 1 pacifier of unknown origin, possibly edible goldfish crackers, 43 cents in change, and enough crumbs to make a meal underneath that sofa. Also, it is not your entertainer's job to help move your furniture (or vacuum away the above listed debris).

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Now time for the photos of indoor party spaces that worked well

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Was not a large space (living room furniture was moved out). Worked well for a 10-12 kid party with ages 3-5. This party was more 1 adult per child attending. This is extra "wiggle room" space where photographer is standing (not shown in picture)

Looks bigger than felt. We filled the space with 12 kids and about 20 grown ups (who were the best of participants and moved all around with the kids). Most of the kids were around 3 years old with a handful of 5 year olds. Carpeting is so nice for sound and I love having windowsills for helping to organize my supplies.

This one looks smaller in the picture than reality. I did both this child's 3rd and 4th birthday party in this space. About 10 kids, most kids sat on carpeted area. Probably about 8-10 actively participating grownups who sat on sofas or held younger siblings on carpet and then joined in the large movement activities. Corners are one of my favorite places to set up my equipment and props. Helps conserve the open space.

This is an after party picture where I was packed up and on my way out. This was a sunken style family room where I set up on the steps (where the photo is being taken from). This was a very active mixed age group of kids (about 13-14?) who used every inch of this space when we were dancing. This space felt bigger than the photo appears. We JUST had room to do the parachute and rainbow stretchy band. Ideally one of these sofas would have moved out of the space. I had a lot of fun with this group of kids!

Stay tuned for a future blog about Outdoor Music & Movement parties, what works and what doesn't!

Sneak Peak: July, August, and first half of September in the DMV are not ideal for outdoor parties unless you want to melt away. October, into November and April/May/parts of June when Mother Nature cooperates are beautiful!

And one last picture to end with. My heart melted finding this old gem. Robot party for my now 20 year old son.